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 | Feter said 66 days ago |
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Clouds Man this is DEEP ..and cos of that the first minute went crying for a cello deep sound acompanied till the harmony sound came to alter the song another step higher ...I really admire your great song writing very talented ..great vocal as well ...nice piano tingles there ..I dont see much wrong with it ..all so well my friend ... Kudos ...thnx alot for sharin !!!! |
 | lank81 said 66 days ago |
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Clouds Hrmm, I can't say much is wrong with this one. I enjoyed the lyrics and the feel of the song. I think Dave is right about the chorus it seems that you go a little flat but it doesn't sound too bad. That's really all I would change. Everything else went great together. Nice Guitar, Nice Piano, and I dug the electric lead at the end. Great Stuff. |
 | blaky smith said 66 days ago |
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No clouds in your music... I cannot help you a lot, my language is too pitiful but all that I can say, it's that I like very much this song. I like the sound of this acoustic guitar, the musical progress and the tone of your voice is perfectly adapted to the melody. All this sounds very well... For my part, I would change nothing... |
 | Mckenzie said 66 days ago |
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to be honest... you could record an hour's worth of burps and i'd probably still like it. I love this. I know you mentioned about how you're not so keen on this one, but i beg of you not to ditch it - it's too good. As far as songwriting and arrangement goes, it's up their with some of your best in my opinion. I think my favorite part of this song is the verse melody (not that the chorus melody isn't great) it's just the verse melody rolls along so nicely, and is bloody catchy too. You should really check out a band called thirteen senses, this reminded me of their type of work alot (but more like Ridd). ANNYWHOOO, i'm rambling...i know you must get bored of hearing it but - 'another great song', thank you! Mz |
 | tokai said 66 days ago |
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Possibly you have listened to it to much yourself and can not detach from it enough to hear it any more properly, cos it sound amazing to me. Sure! you could work it more it places, but for what you have it sound like a worth venture. Your voice sounds so great on this, and so suited to this mood. As always, your ability to create tracks is astounding, i imagine you in that music space you have and how much effort you dedicate to your art, by the sounds of it it must be a lot. |
 | Nick_Flash said 66 days ago |
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cool I like this one Ridd. I keep hearing some tremelo guitar over the verses (in my head) and also a little more over the chorus. Maybe pump the chorus a little but not to much, a little more cymbals maybe. I like the way you have the voices working together. Great start. I've missed out on a few of your last tunes but you still seem to be going strong. |
 | Tiny_Man_Inside said 66 days ago |
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vocals sound great Almost sounds like two different vocalists on this one. Very nicely done in that regards. Overall I think the mix is a little uneven. Dynamics are a little bit too wide, personally I think it could be smoothed out a bit in places. But definitely worth sorting out. Wonderful songwriting as always, just needs some tightening up on the production to make it flow a bit better. Mason |
 | 12parsecs said 65 days ago |
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good post this is a good one. i know how it goes when one doubts one's song, but take note of what people are saying here - this one's a keeper. nice full recording again, ridd. i love the panned piano that comes in half way through the verse. it interacts really well with the acoustic in the left. and you are getting great sounding reverbs out of garageband! whatever you are dialling in - it's working! |
 | Diviner said 65 days ago |
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Lovely track brilliant lyrics, nothing wrong there. The first part of the song is perfect, but the second part needs more energy as if you were being torn apart by your feelings and you sing your heart out to get this girl back. That is probably why it does not sit well. What I mean by second part is definately the second chorus, it needs more oomph. The lyrics though are brilliant and the start is great. |
 | tempie said 65 days ago |
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not quite right? i know what you mean exactly, for whatever reason a tune just doesn't feel 'finished' but aside from a SLIGHT off key on the main vocal in the chorus, this is great man. fantastic backing vocals. the "ooooh" in the break just prior to the heavy guitar is out of this world. just me but i'd end the thing at that point - after "i can hear you calling me through the clouds" - i think the heavy guitar kills the mood - you're a master of the quiet tune. just my five cents and thanks for the DL! |
 | Lennon714 said 65 days ago |
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to beat a dead horse... this is fantastic. Up my alley. Reminds me of some of the great mid-late 90's britpop records. When Oasis and Blur were battling it out. Good lord, great tunes. This is right up there. |
 | TheKapitols said 65 days ago |
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Clouds Thank god you ended up saving this one. I really enjoyed the song. I love the ending, and I think that you could have easily overdone it but you held back just enough at the end in terms of emotion. I'm not going to attempt to comment on the recording/production and why you think it sounds "off" but I will say that the song and songwriting are excellent here. Thanks for sharing this piece. |
 | Vic Holman said 65 days ago |
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cloudy vision ha. i thought i was the only one. by the time i post a song i can't listen to it for quite a while. anyway, since you asked. i think, and this is just me, during the chorus some dual harmony slide guitar, that you do so well would give it some attention and make it stand out above the verses. but in reality it is a really nice tune. |
 | Drew Kopr said 65 days ago |
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Dude This song and mix rocks. Great stuff man. |
 | lengold said 65 days ago |
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I don't feel worthy to critique this - love it. Cheers Len |
 | kassia said 64 days ago |
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clouds Ridd, I feel like you put yourself out there a little more with this piece, especially the vocals. Very emotional and raw. Another great tune. I totally understand losing perspective about a song...I hope posting it and getting some feedback, and taking a breather from it has helped a little. Don't throw this one away! |
 | guitapick said 64 days ago |
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Sounds like... ...clouds... Nailed it, ya did... Great tune...on all levels...love it |
 | kristyjo said 63 days ago |
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I didn't comment last time??? OK, well, I do love the way you sound like you're putting it all out there. The emotions feel very authentic. You have really good feel for when to change it up. The only thing that I notice that might not be quite perfect is a slightly muffled tone quality that becomes more apparent on the guitar solo at the end. I suspect an EQ tweak might improve that. Otherwise - this is a piece to be proud of. |
 | timothy devine said 63 days ago |
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great vocal great tune/a keeper for sure sounds great in my ears very cool when the drum comes in the natural and acousticness of this is wonderful great tune maybe a more brisk strum on the chorus to lift it up peace tm |
 | Axgrinder said 63 days ago |
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A Sad... Very deep and heartfelt! Reminded me of a milder "The First of Me" Hoobastank! I think you have a "WINNER!" All songs need loads of TLC prior to perfection, or as near to it as humanly possible! This one has tons of that already.... I'd like to throw some lead on this.... Just for my own ears, of coarse. I shall down this and play with it....if it's OK with you? I honestly think that if you pursue this piece, you will make it shine! I love the "mood" of it! I think it shows merit..... Never scrap a tune or concept! A song that's nicely written is only as good as the "time" in which it was meant to be heard! At least, thats how the Grinder sees it..... Trudge on! };-PEACE, Alvin |
 | Pete_NB said 63 days ago |
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You don't need to add anything. You've got the tools to perfect this. I can hear it in all the perfect parts. You know how to feel it, it shows. Just clear up those parts that nag you. To be more specific, sing "What do I have to do?" like you sang the first 20 seconds. If you're like me you fall in love with that musical idea, and sing it a thousand times. It just sounds like you haven't gotten quite as familiar with some parts. You have a pleasing soft voice and it sounds somewhat strained during some of the more urgent parts. Find your phrasing, it's in there I'm sure. That's where the familiarity of your work will show it's rewards. |
 | chipan said 62 days ago |
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brilliant I like it a lot. Especially the last minute or so was so good. I could even hear that guitar part lasting longer, but anyway it was great! Your voice really suits this style. chip |
 | Jim Bouchard said 62 days ago |
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like everyone keeps saying This is pretty great already. Your voice is so appealing and the melody is so comfortable. This sounds oddly like a youngish Neil Young song, the way the chord progression resolves on the minor on many of the lines. As far as reservations go (and don't take it too seriously): I'm not sure about the power ballad ending. I felt that was a little superfluous. I have a perspective that is a little different from most as I like a few more twists and turns in my music, or rather, it's either stripped down to a roots version or it's more of a Sufjan Stevens sort of odd production. But I don't listen to a lot of mainstream rock, it's just not my taste, and that's what I sort of hear at the end. I can feel like it needs to do something different, but I feel like going into a 4/4 rock where the crowd brings out the lighters might be not the way I'd go. It's groovy but a little easy, and not all that different. I think the mellotron is a good idea, but in the snippet you posted it's a bit loud. I think combining it with a more expressive Fitch Cello part could be nice. It's one of those "icing" parts that I think you don't really need to sweat over though. |
 | Scott Carmichael said 45 days ago |
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excellent stuff it's funny... some rookie writers would never get past the initial melody line.. after 4 stanzas I'm ready for anything new... and I'd be ready to turn it off.... then you deliver right on time... great songcraft... aside from the heartfelt content.. which also delivers in spades.. there's an intutive sense that kind of leads you the right direction it seems... your perfromances are always top shelf... that doen't hurt... after the chorus, then the initial melody line is fresh again and ready to deliver what I see as your emotional mother load... It would fall apart in lesser hands |
First of all the song is very well written. Your voice sounds tremendous. The chorus sounds fine, dude. Just a bit out of tune. (I think)(But, kind of Neil Youngian)
You should never scrap this.
Maybe, you could hit the second verse with a touch more energy with the singing.
I mean I get the solo at the end, but I also get how it could get to you. Maybe, a cleaner lead would be more appropriate? Drums sound good, too.
BTW, your throw away songs are better than some people's best.
Hope this comment is useful.
Dave