MacJams.com - Song: Occidental Sun by jiguma

Occidental Sun
by jiguma

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Attribution-NoDerivs-NonCommercial

Guest profile visits: 1453
Member profile visits: 0
Song comments: 16
Tokens: 0
Plays: 157
Last Played:
Downloads: 80
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Submitted on: Jun 12, 2005 - 05:34:34 AM
Last Updated:

Description My first fully original song on MJ - lyrics from many years ago teamed with a more recent melody. The arrangement uses loops and MIDI as well as accoustic guitars and Fender bass - I kept trying to eliminate the loops, but got so used to them in there that they were difficult to replace.

Lyrics Copyright 2005 jiguma

In a sweet dream
She takes me for an artist
But I think that she has stolen out my tongue
She’s the self-sufficient lady
She’s the self-possessed Madonna
She was born under a black sky
She’s the occidental sun
She was born under a black sky
She’s the occidental sun

The sun slipped through the window
We lay starry eyed
The searching rays crept slowly
‘cross her face
Her sleepy eyes weren’t open
But I saw she tried
She smiled a smile at me
That I could taste

She’s a royal queen
She takes me for an artist
But I think that she has stolen out my tongue
She’s the self-sufficient lady
She’s the self-possessed Madonna
She was born under a black sky
She’s the occidental sun
She was born under a black sky
She’s the occidental sun

If there’s anyone here can help me
Show your faces
If there’s anyone here who knows me
Ease my mind
If I had the time to
Talk to you of changes
I’d speak to you of things I left behind

She’s a royal queen
She takes me for an artist
But I think that she has stolen out my tongue
She’s the self-sufficient lady
She’s the self-possessed Madonna
She was born under a black sky
She’s the occidental sun
She was born under a black sky
She’s the occidental sun

In a sweet dream
She takes me for an artist
But I think that she has stolen out my tongue
She’s the self-sufficient lady
She’s the self-possessed Madonna
She was born under a black sky
She’s the occidental sun
She was born under a black sky
She’s the occidental sun

Hardware Maton FG 150 12 String
Fender Precision Bass
Yamaha PSR300
iMac G4

Software: SoundTrack
Garageband 2
Sound Studio

Fan List

philonnie

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	snowdragon said 1270 days ago
	Beware loops are seductively addictive. Nice moody feel to this one and loved the "born under a black sky" line. The only minor quibble is I think the vocals could have been out front a tad more. But it is minor and probably more a matter of personal taste.

jiguma said 1269 days ago

Beware
Thanks Snow. When I started using Soundtrack (and GB), I had limited gear
for recording live, so settled for "ambient" or "electronic/dance" tunes, and
loved the fact that I could overlay all these sounds. Now that I'm trying to do
more live stuff, I find that there are still loops I really like - the habit IS hard
to break. With Occidental Sun, I did a few versions without the synth and
organ loops, but they sounded empty. Now I have better access to midi, so
will look to using it more on future posts. As a non-singer in the past, I'm
encouraged that you think the vocals should be more up front!!
Cheers,

---
Neil

	jiguma said 1269 days ago
	Beware The "born under a black sky" line is from a book by R D Laing. I wish I'd thought of it myself! --- Neil

	eltopo said 1270 days ago
	A great track.. Interesting, guitar parts, blissed-out vocals and good production. Keep them coming!

	perceptualvortex said 1270 days ago
	Good song for falling into a trance. Smooth and groovy, I like this. --D

	philonnie said 1269 days ago
	very well crafted... ...song that I'll enjoy listening to again and again (ipod downlaod). Great vocal and guitar harmonies and compelling bass. Very well done allround. I must check out more of your jams!

jiguma said 1269 days ago

very well crafted...
Thanks philonnie,
I've had the lyrics rolling around in my head for so long, and it was great to
get them into a song and get it recorded. I'm really glad the package clicks
for you. My earlier posts have been revivals (mostly) of songs I played in my
early days in bands - this is the first one of my own (apart from some
ambient tunes) that I've done on MJ, so I'm especially pleased that it has gone
down so well.
I love having a "home studio" in GB at last - a long time goal for me has
always been to produce music - hadn't expected it to be my own!!

Cheers,

---
Neil

	said 1267 days ago
	Cool Cool tune. Need to work on the vocals a little I think but the music is freakin' great. If i have to say anything about that it would be there's not enough development. I'd like to hear a more defined climb to the climax of the song. Reminds me a bit of Bill Withers "Use Me" nice job.

jiguma said 1266 days ago

Cool
Thanks Rob,
I've really only just started to sing (always liked being the bass player up the
back of the band), so would really appreciate any comments about what I
could do with the vocals. I know they're a bit rough and I'm sure I could
tighten them up a bit, but it would be good to get some comment on the
technical side of recording vocals - do I need to mess with an equaliser or
other gee-whizzery?

said 1266 days ago

Cool
Perhaps just be more critical of the vocal performance during the recording.
In this tune you doubled (at least) the lead vocal and it starts out great, but
when you get to the first refrain (born under a black sky) they begin to
separate and get out of sync/pitch. It kind of starts to sound sloppy.

I'm no expert but I know from my own experience that sometimes you don't
HEAR things that are right under your nose. This is why most artists have
producers instead of self-producing. It's an individual outside the basic
creative process (usually) that can see things from a more clear perspective.

jiguma said 1265 days ago

Cool
Thanks for the comments Rob. I'm really new to the vocal side of things, and
I must admit to being a bit sloppy with this one. I'm planning to redo the
vocals when I get time, and will focus on getting them better (if not
absolutely right) instead of just doing the one or two takes I did with this
version. I suspect I need a better preamp setup than I have at present too -
must see the accountant!!
Cheers,

TobinMueller said 1255 days ago

Hip, seductive, compelling, well crafted sound
The bass riff is totally cool; the organ is perfect, excellent
keyboard work. Great groove, seductive hipness, audio
concept. I also dig the honest-seeming lyrics, "In a sweet
dream / She takes me for an artist / But I think that she
has stolen out my tongue." Cool guitar in the middle and
at the end. Building on Rob's thoughts, there are also
times you flat, vocally (especially on "black sky"). The
vibrancy and energy you give to your vowels in the
opening, as if you are telling a story, painting a picture,
needs to grow in intensity as you move along; with every
repeat you need a fresh detail to paint with your diction.
Sometimes, you start to sound like you know you are
repeating the same stuff. Very well done, tight,
composition and arrangement.

jiguma said 1252 days ago

Hip, seductive, compelling, well crafted sound
Thanks for the comments Tobin, much appreciated.

To be honest, as a bass player first and foremost, I've only just begun to
accept that I can sing at all, so I guess I'm getting to the point where I might
need to think a bit more about it (much the same with lyrics). I'm feeling
pretty good about the way Occidental Sun turned out, although I'm also very
aware of some weaknesses that slipped through the recording process. The
points you made about diction are certainly interesting to me (maybe it's the
Australian accent!).

I have just posted a new one which is still a work in progress, but in a similar
vein to Occidental Sun. http://www.macjams.com/song/song_profile.php?
lid=11166

I'd be interested in your comments.

Cheers,
Neil

	Moviz said 265 days ago
	Well Neil I listened to this and was hypnotized with that fantastic sound, but I'm more amazed that there's .... only ONE 'Fave' ???? Ridiculous! The vocal sounds great, cheers M

	jiguma said 1269 days ago
	A great track.. Thanks eltopo, Getting more confident with my vocals, and am really looking forward to getting a 6-string soon so I can get away from the 12-string "jangle" over everything. Appreciate your comment. --- Neil

	jiguma said 1269 days ago
	Good song Thanks perceptualvortex, I guess it is a bit trance inducing - thanks for the comment, appreciate it. --- Neil

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